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  1. Eeveelution

    English Coursework.

    You could add a little more detail to make it longer, but still, pretty good. I'm just kind of curious as to why you have what the characters say in italics. "‘Just… stuff,’ she replied, biting her thumb." That seemed a little odd to me... Overall pretty good, though.
  2. Eeveelution

    English Coursework.

    Hmm... Try adding some more characters, and make it less obvious. People get hooked on a mystery trying to figure out who did it, and why. If you release this on the forum, then change the murderer to a new character. Otherwise, it's a good plot. As for the arm, how badly damaged was it? When I...
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